Overheard on Tuesday, 5 November 2013

Overheard on Tuesday, 5 November 2013

When I see women with mustaches, once I start to check their own and making sure that the hair removal is not necessary, breathe calmly. ******

Here are all wondering where to go to grandma’s five in the morning, and I will answer you. With me live such a grandmother who travels almost every other day in the city, what do you think? To ride. No, you represent to rise at 6 am, which would go …. However, she always indignant that she rarely give way and complains of youth … ******

I fucking ignorschitsa. Just like people ignore: in the VC, phone calls, even in life. It is a disease of some sort. Friends are offended, and I can not explain. Just too lazy to reply. I feel ashamed. ******

Last month doing repairs with their parents. Yesterday put tile in the kitchen, without me, when I saw it was that there are two tiles wrong. She got up at night and a hammer to the beat of meat raskhuyachila these plitochki Today we go to a psychologist. ******

Know belief: if you drink from the cup (bottles, etc.) after the pregnant woman, and then she will fly soon. Based on this, I never drink after fatty, while the slim beautiful girls often ask some water to drink. ******

I was lying in bed late at night, I read a book. Suddenly I heard a noise in the street, I start to listen, understand that the girl is taken a bag. She screamed around 3-4 minutes. Prefer to pretend that did not hear anything .. Then we wonder why society is indifferent. A day later, the cat is scratching all. ******

I love it when friends, so not much to write, I forward the pieces of his personal correspondence with third parties. Very interesting to read them, even if there is no special secrets – it seems like a very intimate overhear someone else’s conversation. ******

Because of our grass fucking cat could not vysratsya and we had to with my martyr vytaskmvat huge piece of shit out of his ass, so he smeared it all about kover.poka it all happened we both fought hysterically, because we have never laughed, and the next day he made ​​an offer)))) I rescued a cat and carpet)) ******

Our 9-month-old cat loves dolizyvat after the hosts out of a jar dessert thrust face and sit there with a can on his head a few seconds, continuing to lick the remains. I dream that soon grew cat: then head to increase and the bank will be permanently stuck on the cat’s face. ******

Today stuck right dog for us when we walked podrugoy.Shla with us all the way to the house where we were there and she who approached us immediately layala.Ya can not take it home as much heart razryvaetsya.A now it is under my windows, and does not depart from there, what are the devotees still a dog)) ******

Became the father of a secret lover guy my best podrugi.Kak teenagers hiding, pryachemsya.Tolko not from parents, and from his detey.Ne life, and if not with serial.Kak mnoy.Ponimayu that all this is wrong, but do not do anything. Interestingly, a friend to me as a happy mother in law?)******

My eyesight as I can remember. There were glasses, but did not put them out because of problems with his shy zreniem.Moey dream was to see zvezdy.I here a week ago, bought the lens. In the evening, went out and the first time in the age of reason saw stars. He saw it and cried with happiness ******

I wanted to draw a man, drew a dick, and the rest somehow failed ******

how do I hate it when a guy with a girl talking on this uebischnaya language and call each other kisulya, chick and other zoo .. Well for a fake shit! You also mature people! or at least do not do it in public! I have spasms in the brain and blood spurts from the eyes of those of your “fondling” ..better to have something to stand against her lover did! ******

I am a girl. And I want to be a gay guy. My husband – gay. And he wants to be a girl. ******

Today was freezing at night so that dream, I beg passers clothes people! ******

that would not say, but for me the most romantic moment was when we were with my bath after drinking beer and eating garlic, and then all night engaged in a sort of garlic sex. ******

Put on the avatar photo of the cat. cat collected more compliments than I do. ******

Went out into the street bum a cigarette, a little man in such a cautious voice, staring into his eyes: “I threw it away. Drop it! “I just smiled and swung left feeling attendant look. I do not smoke cigarettes. Gashika for me. ******

We associate with the guy for almost 5 years, only virtually, saw only 1.5 years since lived in different cities, and then I moved to his city. All the while communicating calmly talked about his personal life and revelations But recently with his hand began a more intimate favors, and from my side too, there is no objection. But at first I was wary of eomu treated, but after we slept together, and two weeks later have not seen, I realized that falling in love with him. He was very good to me, but fuck! his troubles, eternal zanyaost removed from themselves. And yesterday we finally met again, I decided that if I will again begin to stick, not lead, or then again, how many hz have to suffer in ignorance. And what do you think we stupidly went to the movies, in a restaurant, he drove me home, sweet kiss on the cheek and all! I went away and thought it would be better the sex was hard: ( ******

when I eat meat, I represent that I am a giant, and Hawa people. ******

Today I dreamed that I wound up in the toilet and ants are any horrible white worms, prozhrali concrete, my surprise and fear knew no bounds, maybe hate it all and am terribly afraid, but what I did not expect, so that such- then she advised me to include them Vayenga, and what would you think? After you hold the phone with the song Vaenga scattered all creatures creepy: D ******

I have a small child. When he cries for no apparent reason, and I still can not calm down, I’m starting to get angry and begin to boil. So, in these situations, I often shove his pacifier in his mouth, bitten her a little, and nothing calmed down and is ready to continue to suffer. Sometimes even suck the nipples on a pair – and me and him. ******

I’m so lonely, that I began to feel sorry for passers-by. Walking alone, to stick sitting on a bench. Little man sat down and started to tell me that all I will still be good. Straight povtykat impossible) ******

Here are all wondering where to go to grandma’s five in the morning, and I will answer you. With me live such a grandmother who travels almost every other day in the city, what do you think? To ride. No, you represent to rise at 6 am, which would go …. However, she always indignant that she rarely give way and complains of youth … cocks have the grandmother I’ll tell you … ******

When I see women with mustaches, once I start to check their own and making sure that the hair removal is not necessary, breathe calmly. ******

I’ve always wondered – that these crudely painted, stinking unbearably sweet perfume fat ugly chick with the chemistry on his head – such as they are? Are they in childhood or adolescence did not realize how disgusting it looks like, and would make a promise would not be like this? At what point do they start to seriously think that this one fucked up – it’s beautiful? ******

If you want to cry, go cut the onions. In any unfortunate situation, go cut the onions. ******

When I was in high school, terribly wanted to do the ultra-trendy colored strands. With really bright colors and unusual flowers do not get it, and so, eviscerated markers and smeared their hair shafts. And some carbon paper colored ebashit 🙂 ******

Teach himself to speak properly, and so, I was not “ringing” and “ringing”, but to speak to wean the refrigerator “lohodilnik” does not work ((( ******

I study at the university, honey. Faculty, 3 kurs.Do recently contemplated change department, too lazy to uchitsya.No after the incident that happened to me this summer, when a tragic accident of a young man hit by a car in front of me, so that knocked the bastard – fled the scene of the accident. After a call for an ambulance, which arrived just after 30 minutes, if replaced me, I ran up to the guy who was lying unconscious, with no pulse and breathing before the ambulance bylo.I resuscitate … Shit … that feeling when I found out that thanks to my efforts, and medical knowledge, I saved a human life, it was something incomparable. Finally decided that I would a great doctor, lecturer at the Faculty of figeyut with my new attitude to uchebe.Ibo save lives and help is fucking awesome! ******

7 years shave heads, because I’m afraid that someone will discreetly my hair and do damage. I am a girl: ( ******

When going out of the shower, always dancing priests dance in front of a window. Today the children out of the yard with me said hello … ******

I’m so shy that when I go to downtrodden people or trolley bus and I have to ask is whether the person in front of me at the next or not, I do not ask, because I’m afraid I’m not as skazhu.Prihoditsya pass another 2-3 stops, until I I can not get myself to vyhoda.nadoelo it all ******

As a child, dreamed that would happen Flood (some reason I thought the water would be out of the sea and crystal clear), and we will all jump out of their windows and swim! ******

When my hands, too lazy to regulate the water and try to wash them before you go creepy boiling water. ******

I read in one VKontakte layfhak about that burning wax crayons, and, judging by the picture better than a candle. I decided to try it. Brown found a small piece of chalk, he went to the toilet set on fire over the toilet. Chalk barely lit, the wax dripped into the “white throne.” He began to wash off that dripped, and it stuck! Brushes do not fucking … I had to scour the finger otkolupyvat … Kolupaev I mean, and here comes my mom … and I’m trying to scrub his hands from the toilet something brown … EpicFail ******

My dream is to lick the center of the polar pole. I will take with me the warmth, that language then peel) ******

I live in another country and communicate only with her ​​mother on Skype. She does not know that I smoke. And every time I have a smoke after SSA to respond to her call – I think it will smell and pussy. I’m 27. ******

today my neighbors on the first floor had a birthday .. how old was I do not know … but everyone there over forty exactly .. so they all went out into the street included music and dancing, singing ditties … from the outside it looked weird but in fact it’s so cool when people are young at heart .. and at any age can have fun))) ******

was on a business trip in another city 4 days. in all that time to take a shit only 1 time, and then barely barely. last night and came within 12 hours of being at home sitting on the toilet for 3 times))) all the same there is nothing better than to shit in his native toilet)))) ******

When I do a pregnancy test, so as not to bother the account of the cup, pee in the lid of the air freshener)))) ******

A couple of years ago I had a little friend, with whom we have a regular sex and nothing more. He noted that during the process, I am publishing the groans and screams. So here’s an invitation to sex meeting in his performance was: “Hi! Poorat today do not want to?”. ******

I and most of my friends iPhones. That’s just the money in the account is usually just me. Russia 🙂 ******

riding the subway, decided to listen to the mantra was overlooked in the player .. start to breathe deeply .. The first pancake turned out a success, and this ball fell to the floor from fainting due to oxygen intoxication ..

Leave Your Comments Below

What the hell is going on? (73 photos) Previous post What the hell is going on? (73 photos) The most unusual wedding (27 photos) Next post The most unusual wedding (27 photos)